Russell Brand once told a joke on Ponderland about a man struggling to zip up his jacket. He’s fumbling and getting annoyed, and the moment he loses his temper is when the zip has won.
On the same note as Man vs. Zip is Woman vs. iPhone. It happened last night, when I was so annoyed with the slow 3G connection that I decided to switch my phone off and shoved it in the cupboard.
It was my way of saying, “YOU, PHONE, DO NOT CONTROL ME! I shall confine you to the dark corners of my cupboard until I have conquered my feelings about you.”
In a way, I wanted to show the phone that I was boss – that it doesn’t control me, that I am not a slave who has to attend to its every beep and that I am not dependent on it for a successful life. In fact, I control how and when I should use it, and if it’s not serving me well, it’s going to sit in the naughty corner.
Last night, it was Singtel’s coverage that annoyed me more, however I couldn’t help noticing that the iPhone and internet has taken over my life. So much so that every idle moment waiting for the bus, walking down the MRT – even the brief pause during a lunchtime conversation – is filled by this electronic device.
I have a love hate relationship with phones in general, due to a complex from the past where I have been told off for not answering calls – but only because I couldn’t hear it from my handbag. This has led to many occasions where I’m gripping my phone tightly in my palm, or obsessively popping it in and out of my handbag every two minutes.
I have been through many phases where I’ve deleted blogs, put an end to Twitter accounts or suspended my Facebook page until I’m sure I can control them. Now and again I fall into relapse, but I have more or less learned to see them as useful tools and nothing more.
Woman vs. iPhone is one of these phases. And surely I will master this as I have the others.