I
your cantonese speaking friends
from sultan abdul samad
basketball and gym and protein shakes
and bandar utama and texas nights
and late-night dinners at home
and leading a conversation
they bring back memories of
foods of long ago
baked salmon and homemade pizza
the one you said could be a face mask
baby potatoes with bacon and boursin
casino royale and failed duck rice
II
and shopping trips to sainsburys
when you asked if
i could even do the
mundane things of life with you
when i couldn’t even understand
the concept of love and commitment
III
in that bus ride from penang to kl
i looked up to you
IV
if only i had been ready
when you met me
well here i am
walking in 1-u
looking for you
where every bespectacled
built man could be you
the back of any broad shoulder
could be the one i laid on
i look into every face
(you know i don’t normally look)
we could go far
yes, you and me
i looked up to you.
V
is there not such a thing
as second chance
i know it would not be
falling in love this time
but choosing to love
is it closure i am looking for
as a way to right my wrong
VI
at this age we don’t normally
talk about things
of the past anymore
they are not expressed
explicitly anywhere
except in poetry and writing
and drunken phone calls
once every two years
if we can’t let go
does that mean
we were meant to be
we could give it another try
give it our best this time
with age and years and distance
and oceans and continents and
space and personal freedom
and career and money
and hopefully maturity.